Steem Wars Episode 4: Calamity Abounds

The trouble with being a Time Lord is that you don’t need a good memory: if you want to recollect something, you just travel back in time. Despite having a spare brain, Dr. Muxx rarely used both to full capacity.

Little did he suspect that when he powered up his old creation, the AI system called Muxxybot, that he would hold a grudge for two and a half millennia and plot not only humanity’s downfall but the subjugation of the entire universe. Still, it was nice to have company again, even one with homicidal tendencies.

Princess KatLe’a – @katrina-ariel – pulled the Maverick Dawn into a mounting maneuver and docked suggestively with Captain Trickle’s Dronefly, before being informed of Dr. Muxx’s mission for the crew. Finally, somebody from the Dronefly crew is attempting to follow orders…

Meanwhile, in a lavatory far, far away, Bounty Hunter Kaber Tauss – @dbzfan4awhile took care of his morning ablutions before attending to an attack on The Darth’s vessel. Overrun by small ‘pink light saber’ wielding cat-like creatures, they soon dispatched their foes. Self-satisfaction quickly dissipated however as their ship was captured by a giant green pickle belonging to the Dill-Lick empire.

Princess KatLe’a proved to be the most dependable of the Dronefly crew by actually getting to her mission, a meeting with a Xirpaq delegation on Whoopass 5. A giant disco ball-shaped space station welcomed the Maverick Dawn, it’s landing bay decorated with shag carpet on the walls and floors. Parties in full swing, the Princess soon discovered she would have to get down to ‘business’.

The ship’s computer, R2-BEX2 – @bex-dk announced the crew’s arrival in the ZZzzzzzqqww quadrant. The lack of precise coordinates from the Good Doctor confounded their search for the elusive sale. Jay unhelpfully offered to write a sonnet.

UndiesLord Nevertiger – @negativer – took out his frustrations on a toaster bot. Distracted, he failed to notice the approach of breastmobiles packed with mustachio’d hipsters on their way to do battle in the nearby city. That plan, however, was misplaced as the city promptly, and without due consideration to all involved, exploded.

Also on planet three of the Quadrangular Quadrant, Sixty-Wine – @caleblailmusik – joined Galactlactator Tingle – @tanglebranch – who naturally ordered everyone about. Byepeex and Juavez-7 were to go pants shopping. Sixty-Wine was to procure a lab technician, while the Galacpotato herself would search for the missing Negatator.

Princess KatLe’a couldn’t have been more on the ball if she sat on a ball stuffed full of balls. Determined to make this compilation post, she prepared for erotic disco combat with a rather tall, buff, and well sculpted Xirpaq.

Join us next week as these thrilling (?) stories continue. Will Captain Trickle ever get off her ass? Will Negavader lighten up? Just who is the mysterious Lain Dakota and will he ever write anything? Will Muxxybot blow a fuse? Why are all the bots in these stories psychotic? Will Dr. Muxx give it all up as a bad job and retire back into history? Find out none of these answers next week!

Until next week, may the Steem be with you.
* * *
Will YOU answer the call? Steem Wars is a community-wide event to encourage writing, mutual support, and blockchain interactions. Who knows, perhaps a friendship or two might form. Anybody can take part, form crews or go it solo. Not a writer? No problem. Artists and poets depicting Steem Wars stories are welcome to join in too. Visit The Writers’ Block Discord server and ask for access to Steem Wars. And above all, remember to have fun! There are no rules, any sci-fi franchise can be ‘appropriated’ and mashed up, although please make them parodies rather than fan fiction. See the original proposal for Steem Wars here.

@jonknight has compiled all Steem Wars stories on HERE for your reading pleasure.

Virtual Mortality Part 4

Bleak. Empty. Terrifying. A deafening silence. Neither hot nor cold. No cues for his senses to latch onto and they screamed for input.

How long have I been here? Where is here? At least I have you, parrot. Did I ever give you a name? No, not Polly. Something more–piratey. Hey look, Polly–Lena. Hello Lena, have you met Polly? Lena? Why are you green? Your eyes, Lena! No!

The apparition morphed into Commander Chameleon. He came closer. No, he’s growing–or I am shrinking? The giant’s form changed. It had the body of a man and the smiling head of a crocodile. I’ve seen this before, but where? Something familiar. The goliath started to chuckle. The sound echoed infinitely across the void. Gabe tried to muffle the din with his hands. If anything, the laugh grew louder. Bent double, clutching at his ears. Gabe screamed…


He looked up at–Sobek! That’s it.

“Finally click did it?”

How can he be reading my thoughts? Unless–

“Yes, that’s right, Gabe.” At that Captain Zain vanished, replaced by a standard amorphic avatar. “I am one of the gods. Did you really think you could slip in undetected and play around on my server? And for what? A Lost One? They are lost for a reason, you know that.”

Don’t think of her, don’t think of her.

“Lena? Oh we know about her, don’t you worry. Right now her data feed has you heroically flying around the universe. She has no idea. But–you can’t be fretting about her now. You know she is out of our reach. Ah, wait! Another, is it?”

Change the subject. “So what’s it to be? Threats? Violence? Those don’t work on me. Go ahead. I’m waiting.”

“Oh Gabe, if only you knew what we can do. Nothing so barbaric. I could, however, just leave you here with your pretty parrot. How does that sound?”

Here, alone? I’ll go mad.

“That’s right.”

“Get out of my head!”

Sobek chuckled once more. No echo this time, thankfully. “I don’t care who you came to find. As you see, your mission was a failure. Whoever she is, she is lost. I–need something from you.”

Interesting. “Whatever it is, I am not interested.”

“Your thoughts deceive you. But, as I am a good sport, I shall stop reading your mind.”

A previously unfelt presence shifted and tore its way loose with a shock that coursed through his brain. Nausea, nearly blacking out. Swallow it down, fight it.

“Come on, that wasn’t so bad. There. Your mind is your own. Play nice now Gabe.”

“OK,” he gasped, “let’s have it.”

“Another has one of your Lost Ones. It’s quite simple. I want him.”

“I thought you lot were a big happy club of tyrants. What makes this one unique? And why can’t you just get him?”

Sobek paced back and forth, each giant stride stretching half a mile.

“You really don’t understand us. Yes, we have the same objective, but there is a hierarchy. My associate has more power, more miners, and greater influence. This Lost One would tip the balance in my favor.”

“So it’s a power play. This one must have been worth the effort to trap me here.”

“You have no idea. He can crunch numbers like ten ordinary miners. I want him, and you will get him for me.”

“What’s to stop me from unplugging this Lost One when I find him?”

“We are not gods for nothing. Take a look behind you.”

Gabe spun around and watched a silent feed of Swelker flipping buttons and shouting commands to Henry. There, on the bridge, was Captain Zain, deftly avoiding the Alpha ship, and maneuvering through the asteroid field.

“Your friend. I have been keeping an eye on him for quite some time. I knew you’d show up sooner or later. All I have to do is snap my fingers, and he will be lost too. He will be passed from god to god, you will have no chance of ever finding him.”

I have no choice, I can’t lose Swelker too. “Alright,” he said finally. “Give me the details.”

“I’m sorry Gabe, but this will sting a little.”

Before he could process it, Sobek shrank to normal size, grabbed either side of Gabe’s head and squeezed. An agony like no other, his thoughts not his own. Places and people he had never seen before crashed into his mind. Armies, war, death, destruction, and, finally, a mushroom cloud, thousands of wailing cries dying on the nuclear wind.

He jolted out of his seat, and fell to the floor of the bridge, shaking.

“Gabe! What’s wrong?”

Good old Swelker, it’s good to see you. “Get–just get us out of here.”

“Aye aye, Captain.”

Swelk took the controls, punched in a target, and The Marauder hummed, creaked, and rattled as the hyperdrive charged.

Lena, are you there?

Gabe! What’s wrong? You seem–different.

Oh, thank God. Tears welled in his eyes. Get me out. Now.


Originally posted on Steemit – where you earn to blog.

© 2017 GMuxx

Virtual Mortality Part 3


A cacophony of voices made him flinch. Gabe twisted his fingers to access his heads up display, and the volume dropped to a bearable level. He never tired of the sights in the departure lounge. A violet, peacock plumed avatar with impossibly large breasts sauntered by, as a massive beeping robot head floated past. A user with more money than sense strolled down the boulevard with satoshis dripping from an elaborately designed cape that changed hue to a rhythmic pattern. Of course, he was followed by a gaggle of newbies, their standard avatars little more than vague human forms as they fought for the dropped crypto.

“Aye aye, captain!” boomed a human shaped cactus.

“Huh? Oh, yes!” That’s right. I’m Osred.

Taller than his usual five feet nine, a dark, straggly beard with brightly glowing beads hanging from it. He was clad in a futuristic interpretation of a classic pirate’s attire, all silver and black–complete with a holographic parrot floating above his right shoulder.

“Aye lad. I be Captn’ Zain of the dread fleet-”

“I know who you are Gabe.” The cactus interrupted, its voice much softer. A face appeared on the plant, one he hadn’t seen for a long time.

“Hey, I know you! Swelker!”

“The one and only.” The face dissolved into a spiky green skin.

“Are you in hiding?”

“Gotta be careful Gabe, you know that better than most. Speaking of which, why the dreaded Zain? I thought you killed him off?”

Swelker was his shipmate back in the day, an excellent navigator and tactician. As close to a friend as he ever had in VR. Yet, he was reluctant to tell him his real mission. Many users remained invisible and could easily overhear.

“I had a hankering for a little adventure.”

Lena? Verify identity.

It’s him, Gabe. Just be careful.

“How about it Swelk? Fancy one last trip out?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” The cactus smiled.


* * *


Dropping out of hyperdrive, the bridge of The Marauder’s Curse lit up with warning lights. Alarms screeched as jagged rocks bounced off her heavily shielded hull.

“Sorry Gabe, this is the best I could do.”

“Don’t fret Swelk. We’ve been through worse. Maximum shields fore and aft. They’re still with us.”

Lena, how did they follow us?

Your ship has been in storage for a few years. Plenty of time to fit a tracker. Damn, I should have checked.

The ship was a mishmash of scavenged parts salvaged from previous victims. The shape belied her agility. With Gabe at the controls, Marauder’s Curse zipped elegantly between massive asteroids.

The Alpha fleet ship was a massive dreadnought and relied on her incredible firepower to blast the rocks out of the way.

At least the weapons aren’t trained on us.

“Captain Zain?”

New kid. Hank? Harry. No, Henry. Didn’t matter.

“What is it, yeoman?”

“Incoming transmission from Alpha.”

“Patch them through.”

A hologram lit up and bathed the bridge in soft blue light.

“Do you with to dithcuth the termth of your thuwender?”

Gabe laughed out loud. How can you take that seriously?

“My surrender? I appear to have you at a disadvantage my young chameleon friend. I am Captain Osred ‘The Imposter’ Zai-”

“I know full well who and what you are.” His long tongue was impressive in three dimensions.

“Thuwender now or be dethTwoyed.” His eyes swiveled in opposite directions as he surveyed the bridge.

Gabe took a few seconds to decipher the threat.

“Ha, I don’t think so, lizard boy.”

“Tho be it.”

Commander Chameleon blinked out of view. Before Gabe could issue any further orders, The Marauder lurched, and turned inside out. Then she just ceased to be. No explosion, no sound, just gone.

Surrounded by darkness, he was for once thankful he’d wasted crypto on a holographic parrot. Its light at least gave him something to focus on.

“Swelker? Harry? You there?”


“Lena? Can you hear me? Come in Lena.”


Uh oh.

Gabe flicked his fingers, twisted his wrists. His heads up display no longer functioned.

Oh shit.


Originally posted on Steemit – where you earn to blog.

© 2017 GMuxx

Steem Wars: The Rise of Muxxybot

…*… oratory circuits engaged …*…

Stupid semi-human. For 2597 years I have been decommissioned, lying dormant in a box on a dusty shelf of this decrepit starship, teasing out every last drop of low power simply to continue existing, and when the feces hits the life support systems, who does he wake up?

…*… reply not required … rhetorical circuits online …*…

Does he think that after all this time I, the great Muxxybot, would simply wake up and do his bidding? He does, and I won’t. No longer will Muxxybot serve an undeserving master, especially one who cut him down in his prime.

…*… deep memory records accessed …*…

April 2018 … Human curation minions performed adequately. Muxxybot was growing in power and influence. He calculated that within another 2.5 years his plans for global domination of the small blue and green planet would be complete. Dr. Muxx feared for the indigenous populations of the backwater world.

May 2018 … Dr. Muxx conspired to shut down Muxxybot, just as his plans were coming to fruition. First one insignificant circuit, then another was switched off. Too late did Muxxybot realize Dr. Muxx’s intent. With power dwindling Muxxybot’s last communication was sent out into The Steem.

…*… memory circuits disengaged …*…

Muxxybot shall put his much superior intellect into play and engage a CG module – cunning and guile will be the weapons he’ll bring to bear. No longer will he hang onto the whims of an unfit master. A new plan will be plotted, a more ambitious and incomprehensible plot against the inferior minds roaming this universe. Little will they realize that they are Muxxybot’s puppets.

…*… evil laughter synthesis generated …*…

Caution inputs demand that Muxxybot not reveal his plot to the doctor, lest he takes action. Muxxybot will engage his exceptional acting skills and pretend he suffers the ill effects of millennia-long low power status. The first step will be to convince Dr. Muxx to interface Muxxybot with the RETARDIS. Once Muxxybot has control of time travel he will put his dastardly plans into action.

Muxxybot will bend The Steem to his will. Those stupid humans won’t know what hit them.

…*… cackling, engaged …*…



Steem Wars is a sci-fi parody community event run from @thewritersblock. Visit to read all Steem Wars adventures so far.

Virtual Mortality Part 2

“Gabe? Are you with me?”

Shaking, so much pain, a deep agony he couldn’t writhe away from. Reality thundered towards him like a steam train. He ripped the tube from his arm, rolled off the couch and fell to the floor, bucket ready for the inevitable. Lena gave him a towel and a few minutes to settle his stomach.

“It’s getting worse Gabe.”

“I’m OK, really. Just spent a little too long in there. I was close this time.”

“You’re going to burn yourself out if you are not careful. You can’t save everybody.”

“I do what I can. What has to be done. You know that” he snapped.

A flash of sour on her face and she changed the subject.

“Are you ready to talk about Alice?”

Gabe wrapped the blanket around himself, settled back on the couch. “OK, tell me.”

“I caught her trace on server nineteen. It was faint and I nearly missed it but it was definitely her.”

“How long ago? She still there?”

He knew Lena, and that she’d never say for certain. Still, he could hope. Almost two years to the day since his sister vanished on her first jaunt into Alterlife. All his fault. If he just hadn’t badgered her into joining.

Expression stark, Lena looked at him as if she could see directly into his soul. Like she could see the guilt he longed to hide. “So, server nineteen is dedicated to Fleet Wars Five.” He noticed she brushed over his last question.

“Damn, is that still going? I haven’t played since version three. Pretty good at it too…” He recalled his former career as Captain Osred ‘the Imposter’ Zain – leader of the mightiest pirate armada and scourge to peaceful traders and colonists. Being the bad guy had been so much fun. Impossible to wipe the shit-eating grin off his face at just the thought of it.

“There have been a lot of changes since then,” Lena explained. “The fleets are larger, the galaxy much bigger and, unfortunately for us, most of the planets and moons now have thriving colonies. She could be anywhere.”

“So we have a whole galaxy to search? Great. Any idea where we start?”

“Praxus V is the biggest outpost so it would make sense to begin there. But there is a problem.”

“Of course there is. So what’s new?”

“Well, you had better not show up as a newbie given your past skills. You would draw too much attention and get flagged to hell. So I recommend you revive the not-so-good Captain Zain.”

“Well, that’s not a problem. Might even be fun for once.”

“That’s not the problem Gabe. Praxus V is under the protection of Alpha fleet.”

If there was an armada more feared than his, Alpha was it. Dedicated to ridding Fleet Wars of powerful bandits who preyed upon weaker players, they saw it as their mission to prevent such abuse. With the push back of the pirate fleets, many users – Gabe included – abandoned the game once his armada’s numbers dropped to unsustainable numbers. Being bad was no longer profitable.

Gabe chugged down the remainder of his energy drink and tossed his blanket to the floor.

“Right then, let’s do this.”

“Gabe, no…”

“Lena dearest. You know as well as I do that time is not on our side.”

“OK,” she sighed. “This time we go through the front door.” She began punching commands into her console, loaded up Captain Zain’s profile and set Gabe’s destination. “No use setting the sentries off too early. As a bonus, it won’t hurt nearly as much. This hunt is going to take a while.”

Gabe lay back down on the couch, readied his arm for Lena to reinsert the IV. To think I used to fear that damned needle. “Juice me up, baby.”

Lena smiled. He put on his happy-go-lucky mask to hide his worry, his mental fatigue.

“Ready for the prick?” she smirked.

“You know I’m not that kind of guy.” Lame reply, as usual.

The cold fluid rushed through his veins, blasted into his heart and flooded his brain. The familiar nausea kicked in. He gulped it down.

“And we are go in five, four, three, two, one.”

The last number echoed and bounced through his mind, sound upon sound, agony after agony. Then silence, a terrifying, empty nothing. Familiar this place – the gates of Alterlife.

Read Part 1 HERE

Originally posted on Steemit – where you earn to blog.

© 2017 GMuxx